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The world's oldest dog has died on Long Island.It was 147 years old in Larry King years.
The last place New York Islanders have won the NHL draft lottery and will have the first overall pick. Unfortunately, the rules do not allow them to draft a new GM.
Sports Minute is edited by Steve Hofstetter
A Long Island man faces impersonation charges after police said a driver he pulled over for a traffic stop turned out to be a legitimate detective. I bet he had the same feeling I had the first time I tried to rate my own joke at dailycomedy.com.
Chris Brown Totals Car: According to his rep, Chris Brown totaled his Porsche after being chased by paparazzi and colliding with a wall in Beverly Hills. Sadly, Brown survived. Apparently his car can take a beating better that Rihanna can.
Adele Wins Again This Year: This year’s Grammy for pop solo performance went to Adele’s “Set Fire to the Rain,” from her “Live at the Royal Albert Hall” disc. This year, instead giving her yet another statue, they decided to present her with “a Dell computer.”
Female Romance Novelist Unmasked as 89-Year-Old Grandfather: Jessica Blair, the writer of 22 romance novels since 1993, has been unmasked as 89-year-old Bill Spence, a grandfather of four from North Yorkshire, England and a former bombardier during World War II. In protest, a 17-year-old Long Island girl is threatening to join AARP.
German Neurologist Finds Dark Spot on Brain Where Evil Lurks: A German neurologist says he has identified a dark spot in the brain where evil lurks by scanning and analyzing the brains of violent criminals for the German government, he has found that they all have something in common – a dark patch in their frontal brain, in the lower-forehead area. The question is, can Apple issue a software update that can fix the dark patch before anyone else gets hurt?
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"Become the Funniest Version of Yourself" - comedy coaching by Neil Berliner
I'm working on creating a new TV show for TLC,called "Long Island Medium Iced Tea".It will feature an alcoholic psychic,who has the ability to contact all the spirits she drinks.
Laid off from the Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog is now doing PR for Michael Vick. After getting pink slipped by NBC, Pimpbot 5000 was forced to take a series of low-paying jobs. For a while, he folded shirts at the Gap, where his motto was, "Clothes before hos." He is now performing lube jobs at a Jiffy Lube on Long Island.
Check out Chris Martin's new magazine, "Comedy Rag," on Flipboard:
A Catholic church in Long Island,is warning parishioners that they were exposed to hepatitis A,during Communion services. One churchgoer shrugged..............exposure is pretty common around here.
Two Long Island window washers miraculously survived 33,00 volts of electricity coursing through their bodies when a pole they were using fell against supercharged power lines. The men are expected to fully recover, and one was quoted at the hospital as saying that he felt "m-m-m-m-much b-b-b-b-better t-t-t-t-thank y-y-y-y-you."