Tuesday , 19 September 2017
News Alert!
  • Welcome to our new mobile friendly theme!
  • Try clicking on a comedian's picture in their joke or video!
  • Check out our awesome sharing options!
  • Click on the topic picture in a joke or video for more on that topic
  • Youtube import is working again!
Home > Jokes >

Alabama

How Recent: All Time
Staff Picks
My Comics
Show Everyting

Ex-Anheuser-Busch CEO Arrested Trying To Fly Helicopter Intoxicated

Ex-Anheuser-Busch CEO Arrested Trying To Fly Helicopter Intoxicated:  The former CEO of Anheuser-Busch, August Adolphus Busch IV, was arrested after he landed a helicopter in an Illinois business park and returned, appearing too intoxicated to take off.  Police say he also had drugs and guns in the chopper.  Hell, doesn’t he have anything to drink at home?  Good thing they caught him before he did something stupid like hold up a liquor store.

 

Florida Teen Kills Mom and Cripples Dad:  A 16-year-old Alabama teenager will be tried as an adult for allegedly stabbing his mother to death and leaving his father paralyzed with a punctured lung, a day before he was scheduled to begin taking anger management classes.  Well, I guess the best we can hope for at this point is that the poor father will be able to get a refund back on those anger management classes his son will no longer be in a position to be attending.

 

Earth’s Sixth Mass Extinction Event Under Way:  Many scientists say a “biological annihilation” with billions of populations of animals being lost in recent decades means the sixth mass extinction in Earth’s history is well under way and is more severe than previously feared.  Meanwhile, Trump Secretary of the Interior Ryan Zinke deputes this scenario and points out what’s really going on here is that God’s really pissed at the gays and if we just quit forcing people to bake them cakes, everything will be just fine.

SaveSave

SaveSave

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedinmailby feather

The post Ex-Anheuser-Busch CEO Arrested Trying To Fly Helicopter Intoxicated appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

Read More
Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

Fleas in Arizona Test Positive for Bubonic Plague

Fleas in Arizona Test Positive for Bubonic Plague:  Fleas in two Arizona counties have tested positive for carrying bubonic plague, an infectious disease that took the lives of millions of people in the Middle Ages.  Health officials are urging Arizona residents to – if possible – avoid these fleas and ticks like the plague.

 

Kentucky Group to Protest Solar Eclipse:  An ad-hoc organization called “Kentuckians for Coal” says it plans to protest all the attention the upcoming solar eclipse is generating, because it helps promote solar at the expense of the coal industry.  Good point, after all – a mine is a terrible thing to waste.

 

Alabama Finally Passes Bestiality Law:  The Alabama State Senate has voted 20-1 to make bestiality (zoophilia) a misdemeanor criminal offense punishable by up to one year in jail.  The one senator who voted against the bill was at Petco and couldn’t be reached for comment.

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedinmailby feather

The post Fleas in Arizona Test Positive for Bubonic Plague appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

Read More
Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California
Laugh Blast!
jokes and videos in your inbox

Site Tip!

Did you know that we have thousands of comedy topics? You can click on the large topic image in a joke or video for more hilarity on that subject or use the search to find what you are looking for.

Site Tip!

Did you know that comedians love it when you spread their jokes around? Check out our nifty share options () that help you help them at the bottom of each post.

Trump Lawyer Claims God Taking to Clouds in Support of Trump

Donald Trump CloudTrump Lawyer Claims God Taking to Clouds in Support of Trump:  In a recent twitter post, Donald Trump lawyer Michael Cohen claimed that God is sending us a message that he wants Donald Trump in the White House, posting a pic of a cloud formation that many Trump supporters say resembles Donald Trump’s face.  They may very well be right, after all, everyone knows that clouds are formed by hot air rising.  One thing’s for sure, if that really does turn out to be Trump’d image, don’t be surprised if he doesn’t try to sue God for using his likeness without paying royalties.  Of course here in California, we’re more avant garde and prefer our Trump images on gourmet toasted grilled cheese sandwiches.

 

Red WolfNorth Carolina Residents Say Endangered Red Wolves are a Pest:  The fate of the world’s remaining wild population of red wolves is set to be decided soon as many North Carolina residents are complaining that the endangered wolves are increasingly straying onto private land and causing problems.  North Carolina officials say they’ve offered the red wolves an option of either moving out or changing color, but the wolves have the attitude they’re “better red than dead.”

 

Fat SouthernersObesity Rates Soar in Bible Belt States:  A new survey on obesity in the United States found Louisiana at the top of the chart with an adult obesity rate of 36.2 percent, with Mississippi, Alabama and West Virginia following close behind.  Who could have known that the Bible Belt would turn out to be a place where people are too big to even wear belts?  Hell, obesity rates in Louisiana have gotten so bad, they’ve been forced to extend “Fat Tuesday” clear into the weekend.

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedinmailby feather

Read More
Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

Today's Featured Hot Topics

Most Popular