by Hayden Black

The most useful place you could yell out "Avengers Assemble!" would be an Ikea.

Oct 27th, 2014 via twitterStaff Pick

by Warren Holstein

What happens if Kim Jong Un decides he doesn't like the Avengers movies next? Do we go to war? Seriously.

Dec 17th, 2014 via twitterStaff Pick

by Michael Blackman

#SallyYates just shut down Ted Cruz so hard she should be asked to join the Avengers.

May 8th, 2017 via twitterStaff Pick

by Michael Blackman

BREAKING: Sally Yates asked to join the Avengers.

Jan 31st, 2017 via twitterStaff Pick

by Michael Blackman

BREAKING: Preet Bharara asked to join the Avengers.

Mar 11th, 2017 via twitterStaff Pick

by Michael Blackman

Mick Jagger becomes a father again at 73. At this point, his sperm should join the Avengers.

Dec 8th, 2016 via twitterStaff Pick

by Warren Holstein

AVENGERS VS. IKEA
"Avengers assemble."
"Where's the fucking Allen wrench?!"
"Calm down, Bruce."

May 1st, 2015 via twitter

by Michael Blackman

BREAKING: Michael Avenatti asked to join the Avengers.

May 14th, 2018 via twitterStaff Pick

by Nick Jack Pappas

After the final season of GOT and Avengers: Endgame, here's hoping Mueller's testimony to Congress is the event that takes down the biggest villain.

#MuellerLetter

May 1st, 2019 via twitterStaff Pick

by Michael Blackman

Rogue Twitter employee who deactivated Trump's Twitter account asked to join the Avengers.

Nov 3rd, 2017 via twitterStaff Pick

by Warren Holstein

Sorry, Mayweather and Pacquiao, but the only way I'm paying to watch two grown men beat the shit out of one another is if they're Avengers.

May 2nd, 2015 via twitter

by Jeff Dwoskin

In Donald Trump's defense he thinks World War III is the name of the next Avengers movie.

Jan 30th, 2017 via twitterStaff Pick