Tuesday , 12 December 2017
News Alert!
  • Welcome to our new mobile friendly theme!
  • Try clicking on a comedian's picture in their joke or video!
  • Check out our awesome sharing options!
  • Click on the topic picture in a joke or video for more on that topic
  • Youtube import is working again!

Dentist

How Recent: 6 Months
Staff Picks
My Comics
Show Everyting

Man to Launch Himself in Homemade Rocket to Prove Earth Flat

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Flat-Earth-Rocket... 768w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Flat-Earth-Rocket... 782w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Man to Launch Himself in Homemade Rocket to Prove Earth Flat:  Seeking to prove that a conspiracy of astronauts fabricated the shape of the Earth, a California man intends to prove the Earth is flat by launching himself 1,800 feet into the air at 500 miles per hour in a homemade, steam-powered rocket he built out of scrap metal.  So, to prove the Earth is flat, he’s gonna go “splat!”  I’m guessing he must have missed the last solar eclipse.  And he’ll be flying at an altitude of only 1800 feet?  Why we have buildings a lot taller than that.  And commercial jetliners frequently cruise at 30,000 feet.  Why put yourself through all this – when you can just buy an airline ticket to Cleveland and ask for a window seat?  On a positive note, he shouldn’t have any problem launching the thing, because President Trump just announced plans to repeal “The Law Of Gravity” as part of his promise to deregulate everything.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Roman-Ship-768x51... 768w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Roman-Ship-1024x6... 1024w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Roman-Ship.jpg 1348w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Archeologists Find Roman Shipwrecks off Egypt’s Coast:  Egyptian officials report archaeologists have discovered three sunken shipwrecks dating back more than 2,000 years to Roman times off the coast of the city of Alexandria.  Alert Egyptian officials said that when the ships didn’t even show up after 2000 years, we felt something may have happened to them and that it was time to start looking.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Evolution-of-Huma... 768w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Evolution-of-Huma... 1024w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Evolution-of-Huma... 1240w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />

Human Teeth Evolved from the Scales of Ancient Shark:  New evidence out of the University of Cambridge suggests that the teeth in your mouth have their origin in the scales of primitive shark-like fish.  Good – then maybe I’ll send them my dental bills.

 

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedinmailby feather

The post Man to Launch Himself in Homemade Rocket to Prove Earth Flat appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

Read More
Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California
Laugh Blast!
jokes and videos in your inbox

Site Tip!

Did you know that all these joke and video posts are really comedian trading cards? Try clicking on a comedian's picture in their post and watch the magic.

Mysterious Cavity Discovered Deep Within Great Pyramid

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Cavity-in-Great-P... 768w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Cavity-in-Great-P... 1024w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Cavity-in-Great-P... 1200w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Mysterious Cavity Discovered Deep Within Great Pyramid:  Archaeologists report they’ve just uncovered a mysterious cavity hidden deep inside the Great Pyramid of Giza, the oldest of the seven wonders of the ancient world.

 

While I’m no archeologist, my first guess would be its part of the Pyramid’s creamy-smooth, chocolatey core.  Laugh if you want, but I think that makes a hell of a lot more sense than Ben Carson’s “grain silos.”  But your guess is as good as mine.  As far as we know, it could have been where the Pharaoh stashed all his dirty magazines.  Hell, they may even find my lost remote somewhere in there.

 

All I can tell you is this – my dentist recently showed me a similar image of a cavity, only this time there were no hidden treasures – just his bill for $275.  In fact, word has it local dentists say if the cavity runs deep enough, they may have to do a root canal.  And that would probably mean the pyramid would also need a new crown as well.  Let’s hope they had insurance.

 

But, of course – all this is simply speculation.  We can never know anything for sure until a trained TSA agent does a full cavity search.  That said, it doesn’t really matter what they find in there anyway, because in a couple of years – you can just bet this cavity is gonna be home to a brand new Starbucks, McDonald’s or a 7-Eleven convenience store.  Not even the Pharaoh’s can stop commerce.

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedinmailby feather

The post Mysterious Cavity Discovered Deep Within Great Pyramid appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

Read More
Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

Site Tip!

Did you know that comedians love it when you spread their jokes around? Check out our nifty share options () that help you help them at the bottom of each post.

Today's Featured Hot Topics

Most Popular