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Elena Kagan
  • 11 Jokes

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Senate Shenanigans

Sen. Al Franken is accused of making faces during Senate Republican Leader Mitch McConnell's speech opposing Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan. It got very heated when, McConnell said, "I'm telling if you don't say your sorry." With Franken responding, "Nuh uhh! Your not the boss of me!"

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Tom Hill

Tom Hill

If you like your own facebook status will you go blind?
Iron Mountain, Michigan
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Who's Courting Her?

Who's Courting Her?President Obama has named Elena Kagan as his choice for the Supreme Court.  Senate confirmation hearings will begin soon.  Chromosome testing will begin immediately. 

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Neil Berliner

Neil Berliner

"Become the Funniest Version of Yourself" NeilBerlinerComedy.com
New York City

"Become the Funniest Version of Yourself" - comedy coaching by Neil Berliner

NeilBerlinerComedy.com

Happy Fourth of July!

Happy Fourth of July!

I always choke up when people sing "The Star-Spangled Banner." When they reach the verse about "the bombs bursting in air," I get flashbacks
to my previous stand-up sets.

 

At the Battle of Bunker Hill during the Revolutionary War against the English, the American commander said, "Don't fire until you see the whites of their eyes -- or the stains on their teeth." The Hessians were
disappointed in the outcome of the American Revolution. Any time the Germans lose a war and they don't kill six million Jews in a war, they get frustrated. They sent Arnold Schwarzenegger forward in time to assassinate Elena Kagan, the Supreme
Court nominee, at a Chinese restaurant on Christmas Day. However, they got the coordinates wrong and Arnold wound up killing the state of California instead. We've made a lot of progress in America since 1776. Back then, Thomas
Jefferson owned black women. Today, Elliot Spitzer just rents them.

 

Everyone enjoy their Fourth of July? Some people fire guns into the air to celebrate the Fourth. Dick Cheney doesn't approve because
he thinks that's a waste of perfectly good ammunition.

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Chris Martin

Chris Martin

Those Botox jokes never get old
Richmond, Virginia

Check out Chris Martin's new magazine, "Comedy Rag," on Flipboard:

http://flip.it/wpDW2

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