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Trump Mocked by Hawaiians Holding Welcome to Kenya Signs

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Hawaii-Protest-76... 768w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Hawaii-Protest.jpg 940w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Trump Mocked by Hawaiians Holding Welcome to Kenya Signs:  President Trump found himself greeted by protesters sporting mocking signs that read “Welcome to Kenya” when he touched down in Hawaii on the first leg of his Asia-Pacific tour.  President Trump was there to meet with the President of Hawaii and to let their people know that they are surrounded by a very big ocean.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Rand-Paul.jpg 640w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Rand Paul Assaulted at His Home in Bowling Green:  According to the Kentucky State Police, GOP Sen. Rand Paul has been assaulted by a neighbor while mowing his lawn in Bowling Green, Kentucky.  Wow, sounds like he’s a big “hit” with the neighbors.  And what the hell kind of Republican mows his own lawn anyway?  Why doesn’t he hire undocumented workers and then just not pay them like the President and rest of his party?  Is it any wonder why this country is going down the tubes?

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Male-Woolly-Mammo... 768w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Male-Woolly-Mammo... 1000w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Male Woolly Mammoths More Like to Die Accidentally:  In a sample of 98 woolly mammoth remains, researchers found that 70 percent were male, which suggests males were more likely to die accidentally.  Paleontologists say they’re not quite sure what conclusions can be drawn from this, but it sure explains why their insurance premiums were so high.

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The post Trump Mocked by Hawaiians Holding Welcome to Kenya Signs appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

Giant Potentially Hazardous Asteroid About to Whiz By Earth

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Asteroid--768x432... 768w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Asteroid-.jpg 800w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Giant Potentially Hazardous Asteroid About to Whiz By Earth:  An asteroid between 1600 and 4000 feet across is due to slip past Earth in early February, but NASA says there’s no chance it will make impact as it will pass 2.6 million miles away.  One thing’s for sure, even if this thing were about to strike Earth, nobody in Hawaii would ever believe it.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Forbes.jpg 580w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Trump Asked Stormy to Spank Him With Copy of Forbes Magazine:  Stormy Daniels, the porn star who allegedly had an affair with Donald Trump before he was President, claimed that Donald Trump once begged her to spank him with a copy of Forbes Magazine.  Spank him with Forbes Magazine?  What the hell, weren’t there any copies of AARP Magazine laying around?

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Forbes-1.jpg 580w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />World’s Confidence in US Leadership Under Trump at Record Low:  A new Gallup poll of 134 countries showed a record collapse in approval and confidence in US leadership in the world – with the US now ranking below China in worldwide approval ratings.  I frankly don’t get it.  Hell, our President bangs porn stars – what’s not to like?

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The post Giant Potentially Hazardous Asteroid About to Whiz By Earth appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California
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Employee Accidentally Sets Off Missile Alert in Hawaii

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Emergency-Missile... 750w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Employee Accidentally Sets Off Missile Alert in Hawaii:  A bogus emergency missile alert that was accidentally set off and sent out to everyone in Hawaii – has been determined to have been caused by an employee who mistakenly pushed the wrong button.

 

Gee, an employee accidentally set off the missile alert system?  Makes you wonder, just what the hell was this guy was smok’n?  Oh wait, I think we already know the answer to that – Maui Wowie – but I digress.  All I can say is, its a good thing our President Trump was on the golf course again, or he might have panicked and pushed that “much bigger and much better nuclear button” he has setting on his desk.

 

That said, somebody needs to sit that employee down and have a good talk with him…“Now listen Sparky, let’s go over this one more time – the green button is for all is well and the red button is for…nooooo! – that button says “launch,” not “lunch!”

 

Meanwhile, alt-right conspiracy theorists have been busy insisting that this incident was no accident at all, but an attempt by a blue state to make President Trump look like a fool.  Which sounds ridiculous when you consider that our President doesn’t need any help from blue states to make himself look a fool!

 

Anyway, one interesting thing I noticed was that, even during a frightening situation like this, you don’t hear very many Hawaii residents saying things like “I told you we should have moved to Cleveland instead.”  That said, I think it’ll be interesting to see just how many babies will be born about 9 months from now.

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The post Employee Accidentally Sets Off Missile Alert in Hawaii appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

Annual Turkey Pardon Ceremony Held at White House

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Donal-Trump-Turke... 768w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Donal-Trump-Turke... 1024w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Annual Turkey Pardon Ceremony Held at White House:  In the annual Presidential ceremony at the White House, President Trump has pardoned a Thanksgiving turkey they’ve named “Drumstick.”

 

The following day, the President angrily tweeted he has yet to receive the expected thank you call or tweet from either the turkey, its parents or the turkey community.  Talk about an ungrateful turkey.  Sad!  Of course, in the turkey’s defense – Trump only agreed in principle to pardon the white meat.  Ironically, with the Mueller investigation closing in, it may turn out that it’ll be Trump’s goose that is cooked – not the turkey’s.

 

And, to be completely fair, this isn’t the first turkey the President has pardoned this year.  That was former Sheriff Joe Arpaio.  What I find most interesting is that – just before Trump pardoned the turkey, he declared it was once again “open season” on African elephants.  That said, the turkey’s fate may still be in legal limbo, in that a US District Judge in Hawaii has just ruled Trump’s Turkey Pardon is unconstitutional!

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The post Annual Turkey Pardon Ceremony Held at White House appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

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Baby Born From Embryo Frozen 24 Years Ago

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Baby-from-Embyro.jpg 750w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Baby Born From Embryo Frozen 24 Years Ago:  A 26-year-old American woman has given birth to a baby that grew from an embryo frozen 24 years earlier, in what could be a record length between the donating of an embryo and the delivery of a child.  All I can say is, this poor kid has to have one hell of a confusing birth certificate.  I mean, if Trump thought Obama’s birth certificate was a problem, this outta make his head spin right off.  And considering its Tennessee, I’m rather surprised she hasn’t been summoned for jury duty by now.  That said, the parents insist the child is doing quite well and is already asking permission to watch old episodes of “Friends.”

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Beetle-Penis-768x... 768w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Beetle-Penis-1024... 1024w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Beetle-Penis.jpg 1300w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Beetle Penises Hold Clues For Better Medical Devices:  Researchers at Kiel University in Germany say the stiffness of beetle penises may help solve an engineering problem people who design medical catheters have had for a long time – how do you keep a very thin tube flexible enough to snake into hard-to-reach area, but still remain rigid enough to withstand insertion?  In related news, lawyers for research beetles with hard, but flexible penises – have just announced a $4 million sexual harassment suit against Kiel University in Germany.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Lanternsharks-768... 768w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Lanternsharks-102... 1024w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Lanternsharks.jpg 1210w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />New Species of Glow in the Dark Sharks Discovered in Hawaii:  Earlier this year, a new species of deepwater shark who’s underbelly glows in the dark, was discovered in waters surrounding the Northwestern Hawaiian Islands.  The light works as camouflage and helps them to hunt, communicate and find sexual partners.  Gee, must be one of those Fukushima sharks.  They have a certain glow about them.  As if the world situation isn’t bad enough, and now they’re telling me that light at the end of the tunnel may turn out to be a shark?

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The post Baby Born From Embryo Frozen 24 Years Ago appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

Hawaii Emergency Management Employee Reassigned

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Hawaii-Alert.jpg 470w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Hawaii Emergency Management Employee Reassigned:  The Hawaii emergency management employee who set off a statewide panic on Saturday morning by sending out a false alarm about an incoming ballistic missile has been temporarily reassigned.  Emergency management officials are reassuring the public that everything is back under control and that the employee has been reassigned – to the tsunami emergency alert division.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Men-and-Women.jpg 560w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Scientists Confirm Men Are the Weaker Sex:  A new study concluded that men really are the weaker sex – because in times of famine, epidemic and hardship over the past 250 years, women have consistently outlived men.  Yea, well – I guess there are different types of strengths and weaknesses.  I just saw research which concluded women are actually the weaker sex – of course, that conclusion was based upon an “arm wrestling study.”

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Bionic-Hand.jpg 450w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Man’s Sense of Touch Restored with a Prosthetic Hand:  Nine years after he lost his hand in a fireworks accident, surgeons in Europe have surgically restored a man’s sense of touch on his prosthetic hand, marking the first time sensory feedback has ever been restored through a prosthetic.  All I can say is, its rather touching to think that now – when this guy gives someone the finger – he can really feel it.

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The post Hawaii Emergency Management Employee Reassigned appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

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