Tuesday , 20 February 2018
News Alert!
  • Welcome to our new mobile friendly theme!
  • Try clicking on a comedian's picture in their joke or video!
  • Check out our awesome sharing options!
  • Click on the topic picture in a joke or video for more on that topic
  • Youtube import is working again!

Jesus Christ

How Recent: 2 Months
Staff Picks
My Comics
Show Everyting

Christian Writer Claims Jesus Doesn’t Want You To Masturbate

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Masturbation.jpg 500w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Christian Writer Claims Jesus Doesn’t Want You To Masturbate:  Writing for the Christian Post, Erin Davis cautions readers that while Scripture never mentions masturbation specifically, Jesus neither wants or approves of people masturbating.  Is it just me, or does it seem like a lot of these so-called “Christian leaders” seem to spend an inordinate amount of their time thinking about the sex lives of strangers?  That said, I’m sure some would have a “bone” to pick with Ms Davis on this issue.  Personally, I’ve always felt that if Jesus really doesn’t want me to masturbate, perhaps he shouldn’t watch.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Alien-Contact.jpg 612w" sizes="(max-width: 256px) 100vw, 256px" />Zoo Theory Explains Why Aliens Haven’t Made Contact Yet:  One popular theory to explain why intelligent life forms have not made open contact with humans is the “Zoo Theory,” which suggests that the aliens may purposely be avoiding contact with humans so they don’t influence our native activity, similar to zookeepers at a nature preserve.  Or, they haven’t contacted humans because they’re intelligent life forms.  A lot of people say there’s been no contact because of the vast distance of space, but I still maintain the Kardashians are the primary reason why aliens are keeping their distance.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Penis-Amputation.jpg 474w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Man’s Viagra Overdose Leads to Penis Amputation:  A 66-year-old farmer from Colombia needed to have his penis amputated after taking too much Viagra to impress a new girlfriend his day’s long erection caused his penis to become inflamed, fractured, and gangrene.  Oh well, all I can say is – “easy cum, easy go!”

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedinmailby feather

The post Christian Writer Claims Jesus Doesn’t Want You To Masturbate appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

Read More
Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California
Laugh Blast!
jokes and videos in your inbox

Site Tip!

Did you know that we have thousands of comedy topics? You can click on the large topic image in a joke or video for more hilarity on that subject or use the search to find what you are looking for.

Study Finds Sore Joints Aren’t Caused by Bad Weather

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Bad-Joints.jpg 743w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Study Finds Sore Joints Aren’t Caused by Bad Weather:  Researchers from Harvard Medical School say the old folk tale that bad weather prompts aches and pains in bad joints just isn’t supported by the evidence.  Now I don’t know about that, but I do know I’ve smoked some really bad joints in some good weather.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Paula-White.jpg 720w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />Trump Advisor Claims Obama Threw Baby Jesus Out of White House:  During an appearance on the Fox News Channel, Donald Trump‘s “spiritual advisor” Paula White celebrated Christians’ victory in the War on Christmas, by saying that President Trump is allowing the baby Jesus back into the White House after Obama threw him out.  Perhaps, but I suspect that after Jesus takes a look around and sees all the neo-Nazis and White Supremisists Trump brought in, I’m not too sure he’ll wanna spend a lot of time hanging out there anyway.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Celiac-Disease.jpg 666w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />New Blood Test Can Accurately Diagnose Celiac Disease:  Celiac disease is an autoimmune disorder that affects only one percent of the US population, but a new blood test promises to detect once and for all, if someone actually has immune cells in their blood – even if they’ve not recently been exposed to gluten.  First customers for the tests are expected to be restaurant servers – who will administer them to whining, gluten-free customers to determine if they truly have Celiac disease or are simply obnoxious, trendy, jerk-off hipsters trying to impress their friends.

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedinmailby feather

The post Study Finds Sore Joints Aren’t Caused by Bad Weather appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

Read More
Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

Site Tip!

Did you know that comedians love it when you spread their jokes around? Check out our nifty share options () that help you help them at the bottom of each post.

Today's Featured Hot Topics

Most Popular