Kellyanne Conway Fabricates Bowling Green Massacre: In an interview with MSNBC’s Chris Matthews, Presidential advisor Kellyanne Conway fabricated a “Bowling Green massacre” in an attempt to justify Donald Trump’s new immigration ban. Oh sure, the Bowling Green massacre? What crazy stories will these people come up with next – cats in the Westminster Dog Show? Hell, is it any wonder Trump lost the popular vote with so many of his supporters wiped out in the “Bowling Green massacre?”
Smokeless Tobacco Co Issues Recall Over Metal Fragments: Altria, the company behind popular smokeless tobacco brands such as Skoal, Copenhagen, Cope and Husky, has issued a voluntary recall across six states after consumers complained of sharp metal objects in cans of their product. Only a six state recall? I’m guessing that means everyone else in the other 44 states are OK with chewing shrapnel.
Texas Boy Finds Rattlesnake in Toilet Bowl: A Texas boy got quite a shock after opening up the toilet bowl and seeing a full grown rattlesnake in there – which then was able to slip out onto the floor before his mom killed it with a garden hoe. You mean a rattlesnake can crawl into your toilet bowl? Guess I don’t know shit about rattlesnakes. This should also serve as a warning for that rattlesnake we have in the White House to keep away from the ho’s while Melania’s off somewhere in New York doing whatever people like her do.
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