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Happy Thanksgiving

You know it's Thanksgiving because . . .

Michael Vick organizes turkey fights

Barry Bonds injects himself with cranberry sauce

O.J. Simpson steals the mashed potatoes

Paris Hilton uses a turkey baster in a scene from her latest porn video

Turkey is on the Bush menu--it's the next country he plans to invade

Dog the Bounty Hunter uses an epithet when asked if he would like any dark meat

Dick Cheney goes turkey hunting and bags a turkey when he accidently shoots himself

Senator Larry Craig is in a Boise public restroom doing the turkey trot

The Clinton's turkey hasn't thawed--and neither has Hillary

The captain of the Cosco Busan knocks over the gravy boat and causes a huge spill

Lindsay Lohan enjoys Wild Turkey at her favorite club

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO RAY ELLIN, STEVE SILBERBERG, PETE CZECH, AND ALL THE WONDERFUL CONTRIBUTORS TO THIS GREAT COMEDY FORUM.

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Michael Phelps Suspended After DUI

Michael PhelpsMichael Phelps Suspended After DUI:  USA Swimming has suspended Michael Phelps for six months after his DUI arrest in Baltimore last week.  Perhaps they should ask Lindsay Lohan if she can swim.  I understand she’s sober for a few weeks now.

 

Nobel PrizeNobel Prize Highlights Brain’s Global Positioning System:  Three scientists the Nobel Prize for medicine for their discovery of cells in the brain that act as the body’s internal global positioning system, which opens an intriguing new window onto dementia.  My brain has its own global positioning system?  Then what the hell do I need Apple Maps for?

 

TornadoMeteorologists Say Tornados Can Target Large Cities:  Meteorologists say that last year’s storms proved that the assumption that deadly tornados can’t strike big cities is a simply a myth.  Perhaps, but even if tornados can strike big cities, their first love will always be trailer parks.

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The post Michael Phelps Suspended After DUI appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

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