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Nick Sandmann
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Mueller Investigation

So it is estimated that the Mueller Russian investiagtion cost we the taxpayers a cool $30 million.  We could have just listened to President ahead of time and then we could have blown the money on:

1. A personal services contract to play wiffle ball with Mike Trout of the Angels in my backyard for 135 and 2/3rds games before he would have to report back to the Angels for a meaningless 26 1/3rd games for LA;

2. 1,200 servings of frozen chocolate Haute at New York's Serendipity 3 Restaurant;

3. Get me to Space X's Dragon 2 orbit of the moon where I would have to bail for lack of funding.  No worries I'll hook up with Captain Marvel at that point;

4. Make a big down payment for what CNN will have to settle on the Nicholas Sandmann case;

5. Make a super, duper PAC contribultion to John Hickenlooper's campaign to keep him in the presidential race until 2/22/2020 Nevada caucuses;

6. Buy 50 million doses of Beano and give amnesty to 136,986 farting cows in 2020;

7. Move in next to Taylor Swift at her New York apartment;

8. Buy .00346 percent of Amazon;

9. Pay in advance for a one year rider on a private insurance policy in 2021 once Medicare for All is instituted;

10. I would likely just donate to multiple good not-for-profits that do not sell baby parts. 

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