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Swine Flu
  • 59 Jokes

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Unemployment reaches double digits

Unemployment reaches double digits


Unemployment is now 10.2 percent. How bad is the economy? The economy is so bad that Archie is pimping Betty
AND Veronica. The economy is so bad that people are using the DMV as
a portrait studio. The economy is so bad the former Miss USA, Carrie
Prejean, had to pawn her implants. The economy is so bad, Donald Trump
had to fire himself. The economy is so bad, the Three Little Pigs
can't afford to get swine flu. The economy is so bad, the GEICO
caveman ate the GEICO Gecko. The economy is so bad, Madonna adopted a
baby from Detroit.

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Chris Martin

Chris Martin

Those Botox jokes never get old
Richmond, Virginia

Check out Chris Martin's new magazine, "Comedy Rag," on Flipboard:

http://flip.it/wpDW2

"Swine Flu Prick?"

My doctor wants me to get the swine flu vaccine; said it's "perfectly
safe". It's just my rabbi who thinks there's something "not kosher'
with it.

Neil Berliner

Neil Berliner

"Become the Funniest Version of Yourself" NeilBerlinerComedy.com
New York City

"Become the Funniest Version of Yourself" - comedy coaching by Neil Berliner

NeilBerlinerComedy.com

How Much Swine Flu Vaccine?

Doctors now think that just one dose, rather than two, of the new swine
flu vaccine looks strong enough to protect adults. I might still demand
that second dose, but I don't want to look like a pig.

Neil Berliner

Neil Berliner

"Become the Funniest Version of Yourself" NeilBerlinerComedy.com
New York City

"Become the Funniest Version of Yourself" - comedy coaching by Neil Berliner

NeilBerlinerComedy.com

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Young Jeezy Concert Canceled Amid Swine Flu Outbreak

The concert, Joung Jeezy featuring Drake will be rescheduled. Young Jeezy was set to perform his hits such as, "Soul Survivor", featuring Akon, "And Then What" featuring Mannie Fresh, , and "I'm So Hood" featuring DJ Khaled, Ludacris, Busta Rhymes, Big Boi, Lil Wayne, Fat Joe, Birdman, & Rick Ross. The show was cancelled amid fear of the recent Swine Flu, featuring Subject Zero, Mexican Boi, and White House Aide
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