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Pilot Emergency Lands Hot Air Balloon in Alligator Pond

Pilot Emergency Lands Hot Air Balloon in Alligator Pond:  International Business Times is reporting that a hot air balloon, carrying 16 passengers and a pilot, was forced to make an emergency landing in an alligator-infested pond near Disney World in Orlando.  Well, bet that was a pleasant surprise for the gators to learn that breakfast is being flown in for them this morning.  I can see the gators asking “say, did anyone order a bucket of tourists, with an extra order of white folks?”

 

Judge Rules Florida’s Stand Your Ground Law Unconstitutional:  A judge in Florida has ruled that the state’s updated “stand your ground” law, which required prosecutors to disprove a defendant’s self-defense case at pretrial hearings, is unconstitutional, setting up a showdown that could make its way to the state’s top court.  One thing’s for sure, in a state like Florida where sinkholes are constantly swallowing up everything from cars to houses, “standing your ground” can become rather difficult.  While I’m certainly no authority on the legality of “stand your ground” laws, I do know one thing – you definitely don’t wanna “grab your ground” during one of Florida’s crazy electrical storms.

 

http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/Indigestion-Meds-... 300w, http://www.johnnyrobish.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/Indigestion-Meds.jpg 410w" sizes="(max-width: 150px) 100vw, 150px" />Study Finds Indigestion Pills Can Cause Early Death:  A new study found that people taking common heartburn and indigestion medication are 25 percent more likely to die in the next six years.  Ah, come on!  Is there nothing safe anymore?  I mean its getting to the point where if the terrorists, pollution, heart disease, traffic accidents, violent criminals, global warming, exploding cellphones, asteroids, supervolcanoes, falls from ladders, great white sharks or rattlesnakes don’t get ya – then Prilosec will.

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The post Pilot Emergency Lands Hot Air Balloon in Alligator Pond appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

Yellowstone Supervolcano 2.5 times Larger Than Previous Estimates

Yellowstone Supervolcano 2.5 times Larger Than Previous Estimates:   A new study shows the supervolcano beneath Yellowstone National Park is actually about 2.5 times larger than previous estimates, suggesting that an eruption could very well doom all of humanity.  Scientists theorize it would be nearly impossible for most life forms to survive such a cataclysmic event, with the possible exception of cockroaches or perhaps a few of the Kardashians.

 

Fossils Cast Doubt on Humanity Originating in Africa:  Fossils from Greece and Bulgaria of an ape-like creature that lived 7.2 million years ago may fundamentally alter the understanding of human origins, casting doubt on the view that the evolutionary lineage that led to people arose in Africa.  So their now claiming humanity originated in Bulgaria and not Africa?  Well, I guess it could have been worse, it could have been Cleveland.

 

T. rex Could Bite With the Force of Three Cars:  Further solidifying it’s reputation as the most fearsome of dinosaurs, scientists say when the fabled carnivorous dinosaur Tyrannosaurus rex took a bite, it did so with an awe-inspiring force equal to the weight of three small cars.  Which is why I’ve always carried a Tyrannosaurus rider with my car insurance policy.

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The post Yellowstone Supervolcano 2.5 times Larger Than Previous Estimates appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

Italy’s Mount Etna Undergoing Magnificent Eruption

Italy’s Mount Etna Undergoing Magnificent Eruption:  Powerful fountains of lava and volcanic ash are spewing out of Sicily’s Mount Etna in southern Italy, with viewers around the world watching the fiery show from the comfort and safety of their computer chairs.  While local residents were a little unnerved, the volcano appeared to be having a blast.  Meanwhile, in his address to Congress, President Trump warned that this is a classic example of what can happen when governments go soft on volcanos and promised his administration will not permit any new volcanos in the US without complete assurances from reputable geologists that they are dormant.

 

Congregants Tell of Horrible Beatings from Church Officials:  Some 43 former congregants of the Word of Faith church, located in a tiny, rural Blue Ridge Mountain town in North Carolina, are revealing years of abuse – including regularly getting punched in the face, smacked, choked, slammed to the floor and thrown through walls in a violent form of deliverance meant to “purify” sinners by beating out their inner devils in the name of God.  Ironically, many chose to attend this small town church – thinking it was off the beaten path.

 

Fight on UK Train As Rowdies Place Bagels on Travelers’ Heads:  British Transport police held the train in Hertfordshire after being alerted to passengers fighting and intimidating others by placing bagels on travelers’ heads.  No arrests were made due to the fact that police discovered a big hole in their case – otherwise, they would have been toast.  Police say they are bound and determined to find the offenders and lox them up on charges of salt and bagelry.

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The post Italy’s Mount Etna Undergoing Magnificent Eruption appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California
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Man Saws Arms at Los Angeles Home Depot

Home DepotMan Saws Arms at Los Angeles Home Depot:  A man began sawing his arms at a Los Angeles area Home Depot – cutting them down to the bone – as horrified customers watched the scene play out, helpless to stop it until paramedics arrived to help the man.  Now I’m no carpenter, but there must be a better way to test saws at Home Depot.  When asked why no one tried to help, customers say they never “saw” it coming.  On a positive note, at least the guy didn’t try to drive himself to the hospital.

 

A VolcanoVolcano Near Rome Rumbles Back to Life:  Seismologists report that an ancient volcano, just outside Rome and previously believed to be long extinct, is rumbling back to life.  Local officials are desperately trying to find a virgin to placate the volcano, but are asking for the public’s patience, as this could take some time.

 

Honor KillingPakistan Social Media Star Baloch Killed By Brother:  Officials say Pakistani social media celebrity Qandeel Baloch, whose selfies polarized the deeply conservative Muslim country, has been murdered by her brother in a suspected honor killing.  Hell, I suspect I have more than a few family members who’d love to kill me over my social media posts too, but luckily for me, honor killings are out because my family has no honor.

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The post Man Saws Arms at Los Angeles Home Depot appeared first on Rubbish In, Robish Out!.

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Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Guns Don't Kill, Postal Workers Do!
Malibu, California

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