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NASA Discover Alien Communication via Twitter

alienbird

NASA announced last night that after decades of searching for extra-terrestrial life among the stars, they have finally found that aliens have been communicating directly with the people of earth, using the popular social networking portal Twitter. The discovery finally proves, without a doubt, the existence of life on other planets.

Boffins at NASA and Jodrell Bank Radio Telescope have been listening for messages coming from millions of light years away, and were shocked to find the answer to ‘Is there life on other planets’ so close to home. There is now undeniable proof that life forms (believed to be from the Andromeda galaxy) have been posing as celebrities on the micro-blogging platform for a number of years. Today, The Daily Skid exclusively brings you the full amazing story.

Professor Sarah Bridle, expert in Universe Expansion at Jodrell Bank in Cheshire explained, “We’ve discovered after all these years that aliens have in fact been communicating with us. We are surprised that they chose Twitter as a platform, but being that it’s the world’s most popular electronic form of communication, perhaps it was an obvious choice. After analysing the data contained in billions of tweets, we discovered that the accounts of Ricky Gervais, Stephen Fry, Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga aren’t actually written by the celebrities themselves. We can prove without a doubt that all four have been sent via radio signal from within the Andromeda Galaxy.”

Planetary Scientist, Karly Pitman from NASA expanded on the story: “We can show that this has been occurring for a long time now. Let’s look at some evidence. First we look at a picture tweeted supposedly by Ricky Gervais. This photo is clearly of an alien trying to imitate the famous British comedian, however something went very wrong.”

ricky

She continued, “Then we take a look at a tweet sent in error apparently by pop princess, Lady Gaga. It’s obvious that the aliens forgot people on earth would see this and very nearly gave the game away.

Screen Shot 2014-01-23 at 12.25.23

Justin Bieber confused everyone at NASA for a very long time, his tweets always seeming somehow other worldly, but the proof finally arrived with this tweet where he assumed his birthday was worth something and could be given away. Only an alien without earthly knowledge would do this.

justin-bieber-charity-water-tweet

Finally we come to one of the most popular tweeters in history, Mr Stephen Fry. We were obviously saddened to find that his Twitter account is run by an alien, however the proof was evident in this tweet when he struggled to get the hang of earthly expletives;

stephen fry

So you can see where our extensive research has led us. There is no doubt that aliens exist and that they are among us. Our advice is to be careful who you speak to on Twitter; it can be a dangerous game.”

Dr David Clarke, leading light on UFOs and aliens, told us, “I always suspected that this may be the case. You have to be wary now, as reading the tweets on these accounts could lead to ‘mind-probing’, a complex way for other worldly intelligence to turn people into imbeciles. I have studied this for a long time and can say, without a doubt, that the aliens are using this as a way to attack the earth. They will make everyone’s mind go numb and then send their spaceships to earth to attack us all. Governments should come clean about this, they’ve known for years.”

Presenter of BBC’s Stargazing Live, Dara O’Briain, was amazed at the news: “Every year we spend three whole days trying to find intelligent life, and more often than not we can’t find any. Brian (Ed – Professor Brian Cox) and I are excited about this find, we always had our suspicions and at last we need look no more. The great thing from my point of view is that these aliens seem to be humorous, great news for the expansion of comedy.”

Barack Obama refused to allow anyone in his government to comment on this story. David Cameron told the press that he’d never heard of Twitter and that aliens don’t exist.

The Daily Skid has employed several analysts to study Twitter activity for the next 30 days. If we find any suspicious activity we will report back immediately. For now, be careful, you don’t know who’s really writing those tweets. To help us in our studies, if you see any strange tweets from celebrities please retweet them adding the hashtag #alienTDS

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